So, my plans for a trashy movie marathon yesterday were put on hold... to go see a trashy movie at the theater. A friend asked me to go see Burlesque and I just couldn't resist. Where do I even begin? The acting? The music? The complete lack of a script? Nah! To even discuss those things would be giving the movie too much credit. Christina Aguilera shouldn't quit her day job. Scratch that! Watching her trying to act is far more enjoyable than watching her try to sing. She usually has the vocal subtlety of a terrified ostrich. And honestly, I don't even know what the hell an ostrich sounds like, I just assume.
I'll tell you the moment the movie had me. About halfway through, COMPLETELY unrelated to the plot and for NO apparent reason (except that it was obviously a clause in her contract), Cher busts out into a huge Diane Warren-style ballad. I couldn't control my laughter throughout the entire number. Probably the funniest moment I've seen on screen all year.
Do I recommend this? No. But if you do want to see it, I highly recommend you get drunk off of your ass beforehand. Unless you're a violent drunk, no need to fan the flames.